Maybe don't sell your best young players?

Before I get too upset or excited about any transfer rumours, I have to remind myself that they are usually fiction. A type of fiction where the inspiration for the story is often drawn from things that are actually happening at the moment, much like reality TV or pro wrestling, but fiction nonetheless.

When Roman Reigns throws his real life cousin through a table or Kim Kardashian tells her real life sister that her boyfriend is a loser — all scripted for entertainment purposes — it’s easy to get caught up in the drama and treat it as reality, because those people have actual out of storyline family connections. And here I am, trying not to get Mad Online at the papers and influencers potentially doing the same thing with Manchester United.

United boss Ruben Amorim is apparently not too impressed with 20-year-old winger Alejandro Garnacho, and he’s been linked to a potential sale this January. Depending on the country and language, rumour-mongering outlets have an EXCLUSIVE that Tottenham are bidding, or an ESCLUSIVA that Napoli are. The price could be £40m, or maybe £60m, or maybe they won’t let him leave for a penny less than £80m.

In any event, Alejandro Garnacho is not a player that I would be interested in selling if I were Manchester United. He hasn’t had the same kind of dribbling output this season as he did last, but given the extreme shakeups in managerial style and squad composition around him, I’d say he’s developing very well. There are signs that he’s improving as a goal-scoring threat.

There are similar rumours swirling around Kobbie Mainoo, who was the untouchable golden child at Old Trafford just three months ago. He’s playing hardball in contract negotiations, which has the vultures circling.

Like Garnacho, Mainoo is showing some pretty significant signs of improvement, even in an environment where a small step backwards would have been perfectly understandable. He’s still pretty far from being a star starting midfielder for United, but he’s improved defensively and as a playmaker this season. He’s trending towards being an excellent starting CM by age 21, and that’s when you’d expect such a thing to happen.

I simply would not sell this player.

If I was part of the executive team in charge of picking the Man United manager, one of the first questions I’d have asked Amorim or any other candidate was about their plan for utilizing and developing the club’s best young players. Garnacho and Mainoo should be cornerstones for the club.

As I am on the verge of ripping United over some potential extreme mismanagement, I have to remind myself that there’s a very high probability this could all be fiction. Surely a successful billionaire businessman who’s run another successful sporting operation couldn’t possibly do something so silly.

OK, so this is a MASSIVE cope. I am straight up huffing copium. I would like to live in a world where the most successful people, those in charge of the largest and most important organizations in our society, are not stupid. My extremely fragile world view relies on this. Manchester United have found a way to shatter it into a million pieces year after year, but I remain in denial.

The transfer rumours are all fiction, right? It’s like wrestling, RIGHT?

😬 —KM

More news and rumours

• A similar situation to Mainoo’s is playing out with Rafael Araujo of Barcelona, who had reportedly requested a transfer to Juventus. It’s possible he just did that to get more money… out of a club that can’t afford to give anyone more money. As Fab points out, they also have to give Gavi, Pedri, and Yamal raises soon. Uh oh!

• The Mail says Arsenal now leads the race to sign Martin Zubimendi from Real Sociedad, but won’t make the move until the end of the season. Surely nothing will change between now and then!

• Chelsea are willing to part with Christopher Nkunku for the right price, reports… well, everyone. Simon Johnson says the Blues want £65m and the price tag hasn’t scared off Bayern Munich. I think Nkunku is a really interesting and versatile player who would likely put up better numbers at Bayern than he has at Chelsea, but it’s a big fee for an out-of-form 27-year-old.

• In other Chelsea news, they’ve recalled Trevoh Chalobah from Crystal Palace, likely with a view towards selling Axel Disasi. The summer’s dumbest transfer saga comes to its only logical conclusion, which is Chelsea just giving playing time to their very good homegrown player who loves the club and doesn’t want to leave.

• The Randal Kolo Muani saga has come to an end, with the PSG striker agreeing a loan move to Juventus. There’s no option or obligation to buy, but Juve will pay all his wages. Perhaps a precursor to a Dusan Vlahovic exit?

• Basically every club in the Premier League is being linked to 19-year-old striker Stefanos Tzimas, who is on loan at Nürnberg from PAOK. I am a simple gal: I see triangles on a young striker’s shot chart and I get excited. Through ball merchants forever.

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