Man City got wrecked by some children

The Premier League weekend recap.

Author

Ted Knutson
February 03, 2025 • Estimated Reading Time: 8 minutes

Today is transfer deadline day. Meaning the January transfer deadline is ending on Monday February 3rd. How arbitrary.

Some of you might be wondering if this column would shift from recap to transfer focus, but we remain steadfast in our routine.

However… that does not mean you won’t get transfer discussion today — the entire podcast will be transfer-focused. And you’ll get a monster recap of English transfer business tomorrow, and potentially other leagues through the rest of the week as we try to wrap our heads around both the moves that happened and the ones the world nearly hallucinated into happening like a poorly-trained AI.

Honestly, after Luka to Los Angeles, literally any old fucking thing could happen in the world today and I wouldn’t even blink.

Some football weekends, you feel really hard done. A dodgy penalty call here, a missed open goal there, an opposition screamer from 30 yards out that finds its way into the top corner, or a stone cold clanger from your own goalkeeper can all change the trajectory of a match or a weekend.

My gambling results were only -1 this weekend (they felt worse), but given how these matches would normally play out in probability world… that was some bullshit.

For those of you who do not gamble, presumably it made for great entertainment!

These two teams do not like each other. When it comes to top of the table clashes, those matches are the best type. For some reason the Liverpool vs City rivalry never really took on grudge match status during the Klopp era, but that is not the case between Arsenal and City now.

It usually makes for both great spectacle and fan misery in the fallout — what’s not to love?

Outside of the scoreline for Pep Guardiola, what’s not to love was that Arsenal feasted on pressing regains. That, plus exceptionally hot Arsenal finishing, and a complete shutdown of City’s attack in the second half is basically the entire tale of the match.

To put it into bullet points.

  • Arsenal scored 5 goals on 1.17 xG?

  • City only had 7 shots?

  • City didn’t have a shot after the 55th minute?!

We’re going to talk about Lewis-Skelly and Nwaneri on the pod later today because the teenagers are kinda, sorta saving Arsenal’s season in a very high profile way.

New rule: If you score seven, I’m going to link to the extended highlights package.

Forest’s first goal is a lucky own goal off Lewis Dunk. The second was a narrow angled header off a corner. The third is just the easiest cross and open header for Chris Wood. They don’t even come that easy against opposition on the training ground.

The fourth was Elanga to Wood again, but this time with feet. The fifth was a penalty as the result of a penalty box takedown during a corner, and gave Chris Wood his hattrick. The sixth probably would have been a penalty, but Williams scored in a goalmouth scramble after the rebound, letting the ref pocket his whistle. And the seventh was a GK kick directly to a Forest player near the edge of the box that in turn came right back at him and into the net.

I thought the Hurzeler hire was very interesting and could work out well for Brighton. Thus far, he’s looked just a bit naive, as have his players. Will things get better next season, and will Fabian be around to see the project onward? We’ll see!

Bournemouth caused problems, like they do for everyone, but Liverpool weathered them and kept a clean sheet.

Look, if you never lose an away match, and the only away draws you get are against top of the table teams, and you play your home games at Anfield… you’re probably winning the league.

20 shots to 13 and some very breezy counterattacks. A typical Spurs win, right?

Except that description was the Brentford stat line. Brentford were fairly dominant at home and still lost.

They gave up goals via an own goal off Janelt’s back on a corner, and then a late one by Pape Sarr as the Bees continued to chase. I suggested in the betting roundup that it would be too early to bet on Spurs just yet, but maybe after the next FA Cup round they might be healed up enough to return to respectability.

Nothing about this game changed that assessment.

Palace had enough injury news to make the line move significantly in Manchester United’s favour (Eze out, Riad out for the season), yet whoooo boy did United stink up the joint. The switch to a three-man back line probably saved Glasner’s job and Palace’s season.

Old Trafford used to be a terrifying place for teams to play. The year’s United have lost 7 of 13 home matches, from the current fourteenth place team upward. 😬 

It’s been a while since I checked in on the Palace YT admin. Only 6 seconds and a brief intro this time around and then a 13 second outro. That’s a huge improvement from the 50 seconds of nonsense earlier in the season. Well done!

Someone earlier this week commented on social media about how Everton making zero moves thus far in the window despite being in a relegation dogfight with a weakened squad was a pretty ballsy choice.

That someone was me. What an idiot.

Doucoure scored after 10 seconds and this match was immediately done. Like West Ham early in the season, it’s all just SO easy against Leicester right now when teams transition from midfield into attack.

Moyes has won 3 in 3, this last one deservedly, and Everton are like 95% safe now. The only question around the relegation battle is which two of Wolves, Leicester, and Ipswich are joining Southampton in the Champ next season.

Speaking of, Ipswich win this one a little more than half the time. Instead, they lost their most winnable match for the rest of the season. They are not dead and buried because of it, but it certainly does not help the cause.

The first goal happened because the whole squad was too ball-focused. There were plenty of — some would say too many — guys in the area, while not being near enough to actually win the ball back back. Southampton got a big overload central and far post to capitalise on the deflection.

Liam Delap’s equaliser came as the result of a nice bit of strength on a one-v-one, but really it’s just another of the endless failures from Southampton high lines this season. Will they play like this next season? Will it work against even Championship clubs?

Southampton’s winner was a scrappy rebound shot from PAUL! Onuachu, and that was all she wrote.

Newcastle are the oddest of balls. They have done alright against the top teams, and brilliantly against the bottom of the table. But it’s the middle pack that have given them endless amounts of trouble this season. Of teams currently 6th to 11th, they have only beaten Villa at St James’ Park. There’s some variance involved, but it still has to be a head-scratcher for Eddie Howe.

Fulham peppered Newcastle from range in this one to outshoot the Magpies 16 to 12, and got two goals as a result. They do that sometimes.

I’m curious how Newcastle will fare against Forest in late February. Results like this are starting to mean Newcastle will need to get something decent out of their away trips to Liverpool, Arsenal, and City if they are to sneak into the last Champions League spot.

Enjoy Chelsea vs West Ham tonight. Chelsea pretty desperately need a result, so I’m curious if Maresca makes useful changes, or if it’s more of the same.

—TK